Well, she said it again   We have a huge pile of boxes as a result of our recent move.  Rather than putting forth the effort to take them to recycle, I gave them away.  I bet you thought I burned them.  I would have, strike that, I would have made my son burn them, but we live in town, so that’s a no no. 

The fact that I gave them away instead of taking them to recycle is not what prompted the comment.  She called me The Elmoe because I told the lady who was getting the boxes to bring someone along to help her take the boxes from the basement to her van. 

Hey, good moving boxes are hard to get.  I already did the AOL by posting them on Freecycle.  I don’t think it’s too much to ask of her to load them herself. 

Honestly, if she had come alone, I would have helped.  Fortunately, she had two teenagers with her.

Wait..  What???  You don’t know what Freecycle is!  It’s just about the most useful thing you can do with your computer.  Ok, I’m exaggerating.  But it is way kewl.  Freecycle.org is a network of Yahoo groups with the word freecycle in the name.  Each group is made up of Freecyclers in a particular community.  What do these Freecyclers do?

It’s simple.  If you have something that is still useful but not to you, and you’re too lazy to haul it away or put it up for sale, you simply post it to your local Freecycle group as a giveaway. 

Not only can you get rid of stuff, you can get some really useful things as well, which appeals to the Cheapest Man On Earth side of me.  We picked up a trampoline, one of those big wooden swing sets, and a bunch of Little Tyke yard toys, including a kid’s picnic table.  We also got a brand new set of luggage, some books, videos, software, and lots of clothes for the kids. 

I’ve been freecycling for more than three years.  It has saved me at least a dozen AOL’s.

So be sure to join your local group, and remember this Elmoe tip.  When you’re giving something away, be sure to tell them to bring help to load.  You’d be surprised at how many people expect you to load it for them.

Since a man’s career is his biggest AOL, you’re probably wondering what The Elmoe does to pay the bills. As you may have guessed, it is incredibly simple.  And yet it supports a family of 8 with a hefty new mortgage, and two car payments.  Right now, there are only about 40,000 people in the entire world that do what I do.  So there’s plenty of room for more.  This is The Elmoe’s biggest tip of all. If you want it, and trust me, you do, you’re going to have to share an Elmoe tip of your own, or at least comment on my blog.

I just noticed that my lawn is in serious need of mowing. I better get off my lazy butt and tell my son to mow it . So until next time, this is The Elmoe saying, “If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, I’m not cleaning up after it.”

I hate weeding flowerbeds, or gardens.  So, I don’t do it.  I told Bonnie, “Don’t plant any gardens or flowerbeds that you don’t have time to weed, because I’m not going to do it.” 

I’m not totally anti-plant.  I have a Poinsettia from many Christmases ago.  I have it because my Brother-in law told me that you can’t keep a Poinsettia alive from year to year.  It is a little bit of an AOL.  I have to put in some plant food spikes every three months, and transplant it into a bigger pot once a year.  But it’s worth it just to get on his case when they visit over Christmas. 

What’s that you say?   “What about watering?”  No prob.  Here’s an Elmoe tip from years ago.  Use a PlantMinder water bulb.  You can go 5 or 6 weeks without that AOL.

There is one other plant that I just have to have, tomatoes.  Nothing beats home-grown tomatoes.  Come on everyone, sing along..  Every year I weeded the tomato patch.  But I did away with that AOL this year.

You’ve probably seen those topsy-turvy upside down tomatoes on TV.  Don’t waste your money. (Besides being the laziest man on earth, I’ve often been called the cheapest man on earth.  These two titles often conflict.)  You can easily make them yourself for a lot less. When Bonnie asked what I was doing and why,  I knew she would say it, and she didn’t let me down.

If you don’t have a source for free buckets.  Try you local grocery store.  I got 4 three gallon buckets with lids from the Shop and Save for $0.50 each.  You won’t find them on the shelf.  These are buckets that stuff comes in for the deli or bakery.  They usually return them or toss them out.  But if you ask the manager, you can get them, maybe even for free.

This year, The Elmoe isn’t pulling a single weed.  Plus, the hard part is already done for next year.  I can use these same buckets for years and years.

Since a man’s career is his biggest AOL, you’re probably wondering what The Elmoe does to pay the bills. As you may have guessed, it is incredibly simple.  And yet it supports a family of 8 with a hefty new mortgage, and two car payments.  Right now, there are only about 40,000 people in the entire world that do what I do.  So there’s plenty of room for more.  This is The Elmoe’s biggest tip of all. If you want it, and trust me, you do, you’re going to have to share an Elmoe tip of your own, or at least comment on my blog.

Oh look.  It’s time for my nap.  So until next time, this is The Elmoe saying, “Why put off till tomorrow what you can get someone else to do today?”